(Newswire.net — March 23, 2021) — For those who are interested in being locked in a chastity device, you can always self-lock and trust that you won’t be tempted to unlock for every stiff breeze that comes past you. However, as Oscar Wilde said “I can resist everything except temptation” – and with your member locked away and the key tantalisingly within reach, it’s going to happen, isn’t it?
Also one of the key attractions of male chastity is the handing over of your releases with the handing over of your key. When you self lock, you might find that you don’t get the same mental calm that comes with having a keyholder. Obviously, this isn’t disparaging to those who do successfully self-lock – many people do it and with great success.
Some of those attribute it to making the key harder to access – like having it in a lock box or hidden away somewhere just annoyingly inaccessible (like somewhere in that junk drawer in your office or in that pile of Things in your garage). The benefit of doing this is that it provides a mental barrier for you to cross – whilst hunting for the key, you have the time to reflect to decide if you actually really want to unlock or if it is just a moment of momentary weakness.
You may have weighed all these options up and decided that you would like to have a chastity keyholder. Maybe your partner isn’t keen on being your keyholder or perhaps you’re not currently in a relationship, whatever the reason, finding a keyholder that can meet your needs. But how do you go about it and ensure that it’s going to be a mutually beneficial arrangement for all parties involved?
The first thing to do is to make a list of what you’d like from a keyholder. This may not have been something you’ve considered yet but it’s time to get a legal pad and a pen out, it’s thinking time! And who can resist a good list? Think about the basics – Are you literally just looking to hold your key for you so you are not tempted to unlock yourself? Think a little deeper – What situations would you need to request your key and how can you ensure you can access that quickly? (Never forget that if your keyholder is not in the same city as you – you will be at the mercy at the postal services!).
Now that you’ve considered that particular practicality – are you looking for just a practical service? Someone to hold your key? If so, the next step will be doing the searching – or you can ask a kink-friendly friend to take possession of it. However – are you looking for more from the experience? Would you like to be set challenges or tasks in order to evidence your devotion to your keyholder? Do you want regular conversation or contact with them? Or do you want the opportunity for in-person sessions where you get unlocked and the potential opportunity for release? All of these are points you need to consider – you need to be honest with yourself about your expectations wearing a device so you don’t waste your precious time and the time of the Dominants you are contacting. Also if you contact a keyholder with a set of expectations that doesn’t meet the services they offer, you will soon be frustrated in an entirely different way than wearing a chastity device.
Another crucial point is to consider the price point of finding a keyholder. Regardless of how much you want this, you also need to ensure that you are not going to put yourself into financial hardship. As you are an adult, it’s a reasonable assumption that you know how much “fun money” you have excess a month outside of bills and rent and food, so decide a portion of that which you are willing to spend on a keyholder as they’re providing a service so will need to be paid.
On the other hand, if you are in a tight financial situation, consider the other ways that you might be able to add value to a Keyholder. Maybe you can offer your services promoting them online via social media accounts, maybe you have some web skills that you can agree as a trade of services. Remember that you still have some worth, you just need to be aware and confident about what you can offer around your other life priorities.
Now you’ve got your device in one hand and your list of Keyholder requirements in the other. Set them down in front of you and time to browse the web for someone that you can approach to discuss keyholding. You may already follow some Dominants online through Fetlife, Twitter or OnlyFans – check their websites to see if they offer keyholding and what their keyholding offer is, plus the cost. If they don’t explicitly mention their prices, contact them and politely inquire. Do not send an email saying “how much” or “wut u charge?” If it almost certainly guarantees that you will not receive a polite response if you receive one at all.
If you are having a problem finding a Dominant, some retail websites that sell male chastity devices like the House of Denial, also have a page of verified Keyholders that you can use to check out. The House of Denial only has female keyholders, but it is worth checking multiple websites or Reddit if you find the list of keyholders doesn’t wet your whistle, so to speak. A point of safety is about websites that have a list of verified keyholders. Whilst the majority of people who advertise keyholding services are legitimate, there is always the risk of scammers so if you are concerned, try checking out pages like this or through your own checks via email.
By now, you should have your device, a list of your wants in a keyholder, a sensible budget and have reached out to those who might be willing to hold the key to your device. Once you’ve reached an arrangement with your keyholder, the world is your (closed) oyster. Whether you just revel in the knowledge that your key is held safely by someone else or every day you get contact and daily tasks set by a keyholder, hopefully having a keyholder meets and exceeds your wildest expectations.