Opening nationwide in theatres February 11, 2011 is Touchstone’s new animated 3D film, Gnomeo and Juliet, based on the classic Italian love story by Matteo Bandello, later to be penned in English by William Shakespeare. In this garden-gnome version, yard ornaments at 2B and ?[not] 2B Verona Drive are feuding neighbors.
Montagues in blues are proud of their handsome and brave Gnomeo [Romeo], who engages in lawn-mower go-cart races against the red-neck reds, and the heat turns up until Gnomeo falls in love with the belle Juliet. Dolly Parton has a two-bit part, helping the racers determine which is better – the one on the left, or the one on the right.
This fabulous flick is executive-produced by rock-star Sir Elton John and his husband, David Furnish; central to the theme of Gnomeo is the basic principle that everyone should be free to love the person he or she wants. Hits from the Sir Elton John repertoire embellish the soundtrack, with leitmotifs of “Don’t go breaking my heart,” “I remember when rock was young,” blend perfectly with Sir Elton’s new duet with gay icon Lady Gaga: “Hello, Hello.”
Juliet’s nurse appears in the Gnomeo version as a flirtatious frog with come-hither sensuality. When a lengthy shitake is cast down her throat, which she withdraws without gagging, instead of disgust, she conveys a suggestive coquetry toward the meaty mushroom.
Gnomeo and Juliet happen upon a pink flamingo hidden in a closet, who pines “Other people have destroyed my life.” The pint-sized pair help get the gaily pigmented pink Phoenicopterus out of his heavyheartedness and back into the screaming pink euphoria he once knew before the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern moving firm separated him from his fine feathered friend. Incidentally, at the time of Shakespeare, there was no such thing as “the color pink;” in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, act 2, sc. 4, l. 57, when Mercutio says “I am the very pink of courtesy,” the word pink meant perfection. Pink as a color is first recorded in 1681, and was traditionally a color for boys.
In Tudor England, sumptuary laws dictated which class of people could wear which colors – gold, silver, crimson or scarlet, deep indigo blue, violet colors, deep black and pure white colors were only worn by the highest aristocracy. The colors worn in Gnomeo and Juliet suggest gnomes are noble inhabitants of Stratford-Upon-Avon. The architecture in Gnomeo appears modeled after the two-family half-timbered home in Henley Street where William Shakespeare was born.
Count Paris appears in the Gnomeo version as the master gardener with encyclopedic knowledge of horticulture. Count Paris transmogrifies, albeit for only a moment, into Sir Elton John at the piano, wearing passionate purple, the same color Sir Elton wore to the Hollywood premiere. (Husband David Furnish wore Montague blue to the gala event.)
At the time of Shakespeare, garden gnomes did not exist; they were invented circa the mid-1700s in Gräfenroda Germany. Gnomes were first introduced to the United Kingdom in 1847 by Sir Charles Isham, an avid gardener, who brought 21 gnomes from Gräfenroda to grace the palace grounds at Lamport Hall in Northamptonshire. Today, the ubiquitous baubles are popular with the suburban bourgeoisie, and are forbidden from the prestigious Chelsea Flower Show as aesthetically deficient and kitschy.
Gnomeo and Juliet falls toward the kitschy end of the spectrum, but in a fun way. It is the perfect medium to introduce small children to Shakespeare without having to deal with the morbidity of it all. The artistry is superb, the enunciation is clear, the colors are vibrant, and the plot is engaging. Obviously, it’s not a substitute for reading the Shakespearian version in a college classroom setting.
Voices include: James McAvoy (Gnomeo), Emily Blunt (Juliet), Jim Cummings (Featherstone), Ashley Jensen (Nanette), Matt Lucas (Benny), Jason Statham (Tybalt), Michael Caine (Lord Redbrick), Maggie Smith (Lady Blubery), Stephen Merchant (Paris), Patrick Stewart (William Shakespeare), Julie Walters (Miss Montague), Richard Wilson (Mr Capulet), Ozzy Osbourne (Fawn), Dolly Parton (Dolly) and Hulk Hogan (Terrafirmenator).
Rating: 7 hearts out of 10. Excellent for very young children.
Dr. Anton Anderson