(Newswire.net — May 19, 2020) — The most successful mentor-mentee relationships are not forced, but rather one where both mentor and mentee are gaining something positive by being engaged with one another. Your child may need a mentor for many reasons, and finding the right one will benefit them in the long-run. Learn how to find the right mentor and how these relationships can make a successful and positive impact on your child’s life with these important tips.
Providing support, guidance, and advice, mentors help kids of all backgrounds unlock their inner potential and grow into stronger, more confident adults. Mentors are the non-familial coaches, tutors, teachers, and caring adults who help strengthen kids’ self-esteem, decision-making skills, academic achievement, and career goals. Although family members like parents, guardians, and older siblings make great default mentors, students can often benefit from an outside role model to provide objective support. Simply put, they can make quite the positive impact on your child’s life.
Why Your Child Needs a Mentor
Why does your child need a mentor if she already has supportive, positive role models at home? The main reason is because it will make her a better, more successful adult. The effects of mentorship have been well-documented across various studies. Research shows that young adults who have a mentor tend to reach their goals. In fact, mentored young adults are more likely to enroll in college, more likely to volunteer regularly, and even more likely to become leaders in their communities.
Young adults in mentorship relationships tend to excel in their education, too. They skip school less often and have better rates of attendance. At the same time, mentored students have a more well-rounded set of skills and interests, as they’re more likely to regularly participate in extracurricular activities and sports. Add in a lower rate of depressive symptoms and the fact that mentored children are 46 percent less likely to start using drugs, and there’s no denying the benefits of mentorship.
Obviously, all of these positive effects will have a major impact on your youngster’s life, both now and in the future. Building positive habits, excelling in school, and becoming a leader are things that will last a lifetime. There are some pros in the short term, too — positive mentorship relationships can lead to college scholarships, admission to college, help with finding an internship and even job opportunities.
How to Find the Right Mentor
Now that you know finding your child a good mentor will definitely benefit them in the long-run, it’s time to work with them to find one who suits their goals and needs.
- Ask Your Child These Key Questions — Not all mentors are right for all kids, and that’s just fine. The ideal mentor is one who will provide tailored guidance in areas your child has specific interests or tends to struggle. They may also have a unique perspective that allows them to relate to your child’s circumstances (for example, they may have a learning disability, be a member of the LGBTQ+ community, or love a certain sport). To get an idea of what kind of mentor to choose, ask your child the following questions:
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Who is a non-family member you admire and why?
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Who is the person you most respect and why?
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Is there anything you think may prevent you from reaching your goals?
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What is one skill you lack but wish you possessed?
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Are you ready to foster a relationship with someone you look up to?
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Who are a few people you want to be like and why?
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What would you like to be doing in 10 years?
- Think About Your Child’s Unique Needs — The most important consideration in helping your child find a mentor is finding someone who will help them reach their goals. Sometimes that involves being upfront with yourself (and your child’s future mentor) about the specific skills and characteristics your child lacks. For example, if your child is generally introverted and doesn’t have much positive social interaction, pair them with a role model who is more outgoing but can still relate to your child’s unique experience. Look for mentors who complement your child’s personality and help them grow.
- Reach Out and Ask — Helping your child find a good role model in their life may take a bit of effort. Coaches, tutors, music teachers, and others often become natural mentors in a young person’s life, but what if there’s no one around who can fill that role? Don’t worry — there are many ways you can find one in your community. Here are some good places to start.
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Talk to your child’s advisor or guidance counselor, as they often work with other students, coaches, and organizations that specialize in mentorship. The school may even already have a mentoring program set up that will pair your child with someone in the program.
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Try nonprofit mentorship organizations in your community. Many of these groups exist for the sole purpose of pairing mentors with mentees, so they can really simplify the process for you. This is a great option because most organizations run background checks and fully vet their volunteers, so you don’t have to worry. A great resource is MENTOR: The National Mentoring Partnership, which runs a directory of mentorship programs throughout the U.S.
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Ask people in your community. You don’t necessarily have to be a part of a formal program to find a great mentor. Asking someone in your child’s life — such as a teacher or coach — can be a good place to start. If you don’t have anyone in mind, ask friends and family for someone they trust. Just note that there are some risks with this approach, since you probably won’t get the safeguard of a background check.
Mentorship Is a Two-Way Relationship
You know that a good mentor will benefit your child, but like anything in life, you shouldn’t force them into it. At the end of the day, a positive mentoring relationship is one between two individuals — child and mentor. You are generally not a factor in the equation, and your child has to want to invest in the partnership and contribute. The most successful mentor-mentee relationships are the ones where both parties are gaining something positive, so make sure your child is ready to fully engage.